Can anyone say “conspiracy”? Steven Colbert’s presidential run has been smashed to pieces by the humorless Democratic executive council of South Carolina, which voted 13-3 to deny his application to be put on the ballot as a Democrat. As Waring Howe, a member of the council, put it Colbert “serves to detract from the serious candidates on the ballot.” But Dennis Kucinich, the guy who sees UFOs, is allowed on? Not that there’s anything wrong with that.
Not all the members of the council lacked a sense of humor. State Rep. Gilda Cobb-Hunter (who I think outranks Mr. Missed-the-Point Howe, there) chided the people who voted against Colbert’s name being put on the ballot as taking things a little too seriously. I happen to agree. Yes, Colbert’s run was a stunt aimed at publicizing his show. But he could have brought a lot of publicity to South Carolina through it. It’s not every day you get a favorite son with a much-loved faux-news show. I mean, how many times has Bill O’Reilly extolled his home state? Or Anderson Cooper? Pshaw.
Unfortunately, Colbert can’t run as a Republican, either, since he missed the filing deadline to apply for a spot on the ballot. I can’t blame him, though. Whereas the fee for the Democrat Party was only $2,500 (fully refunded after his denial), the fee for the Republicans was a whopping $35,000. Um, okay. Either the Democrats have really low standards or the Republicans think too highly of themselves…wait…right, I forgot: both are true.
Anyways, I was so looking forward to those Colbert for President bumper stickers…guess I’ll have to stick with the Picard-Riker one for now. Also, if you’re interested, I came across a very handy replacement for Wikipedia. Guaranteed to have more truthiness than Wikipedia will ever have.